backwards reading.

                   I know some books aren't my level and that i will come across a book that might be a little too advanced for me to read. However; i don't like to think about that. i like to pick up a book and read and read and read. I'll interperate what i understand and maybe there will be a bit where i'm just like "what?" but i move on and make sence of it later. I never thought too much about how it would effect my reading when i would get lost in a book, hunting for my last page. (because my bookmarks always fall out) So i didn't think too much every time i would pick up my book and begin reading at a different page than i left off at. but now, it's getting to a point where i get what's going on in my book, but all the events are out of order and i feel like it effects the way i read this book i'm reading and how i think of the characters. because of this i believe i haven't build the relationship (with the characters) that i should have built by now. i also feel like every scene is just the same. i feel like nothing has really changed in the book withen these first -i dont know- hundred pages and nothing is really going on. What doesn't help, is that i think this book is just a little bit too advanced for my reading. like, i understand it fine, but not everything registers in my brain and part of the reason that i am not able to go straight back to the page i left off at is because when i'm trying to find that page, i end up rereading parts of the book. Because the book is a little advanced, i rereadad every part in a different way. It's not fair though because i kinda really like this book, and my parents saw the movie and said it was funny and i'm dying to see it but i know that the book is way better than the movie but i don't wana ruin the book for myself. It's all so confusing. . . i don't know how i will resolve this.